Utilizador:TheAlbinoOrc/Sandbox/14

It's been an honor to host you, Lord Sheogorath.

My Lord! What brings you to my humble museum?

May I have a snippet of your hair for my museum?

Welcome to the Museum of Oddities, Lord Sheogorath. I have collected all the wonders of your lands here.

You should come see my museum, Lord Sheogorath. I've built it just to honor you.

Have you found any new Oddities?

I hope you're enjoying the museum!

Hello, I'm Una Armina. Perhaps you've heard of my Museum of Oddities?

There you can view all the finest Oddities of the Realm. I'm always looking for new exhibits, so be sure to think of me when you see anything Odd!

Welcome to the Museum of Oddities! Let me know if you'd like a tour of our exhibits.

How mercenary of you! You and I both know the Museum is the rightful home for such an Oddity. I hope you change your mind eventually.

I'm surprised at your attitude. Here I thought you were a patron of my Museum. I only hope you change your mind one day.

Have it your way. The honor of having one of their items on display in the Museum is enough for most people. But not you, it seems.

Oh, how generous of you! This blind Watcher's Eye is sure to draw a crowd.

Thank you! It is a truly odd Tentacle. I'm so glad to have one back on display.

You really are a dear! A true friend to the Museum. Perhaps Lord Sheogorath himself will come see the exhibit one day.

Fantastic. I can't tell you what it means to me to have this in my collection. You are a good soul.

Thank you, dearie! My museum just wasn't the same without the ashes on display.

How sweet! You truly are a patron of the Odd!

Really? For free? That's so generous of you. I'll put this tomato right back where it belongs in a place of honor!

Such a benefactor! I'll be sure to mention your generosity to all my other patrons.

Oh, you are a sweetie. The museum hasn't been the same since this went missing. It's so nice of you to donate it to the cause of Oddity.

I don't know what to say! You're such a dear! I'm going to put this dagger right back where it belongs.

Oh, my! I'm so glad to have this back. People have been asking me what happened to my Ring of Disrobing, and I just didn't know what to tell them.

Wonderful! I'll put you on my list of Special Donors. It's a very exclusive list, you know.

Well aren't you a darling? I know just where I'm going to put this.

How generous of you! You'd just give it to me? You are a true lover of Oddities, aren't you?

That's a lovely gesture! Thank you so much. Everyone will be so glad to have the Ring back where it belongs.

Oh... I already have something in the Museum very similar. But don't give up, I'm sure something truly Odd will turn up soon.

What a shame. One Sheogorath-shaped amber lump is Odd; two are simply boring. Maybe next time you'll find something really Odd.

Too bad... I already have a deformed Swamp Tentacle. But next time I'm sure you'll find something truly Odd, don't worry.

I could swear I once had a Blind Watcher's Eye just like that.... I would like to replace it, but the funds just aren't available.

This looks just like the one I have... well, had in the Museum. It seems to have been misplaced. I wish I had the funds to buy it off you...

Well, if it doesn't look just like you! So lifelike! My patrons are going to absolutely adore this.

If it isn't the spitting image of Lord Sheogorath himself! So lifelike you can almost see his bad eye twitching! Perfect!

Interesting... it looks vaguely familiar, like I once had one of these on display. I only wish I had the funds to buy it off you...

Wonderful! Looking at the tentacle, I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or terrified. Just the kind of thing I'm looking for!

Ah! How deliciously odd! I've never seen a Blind Watcher's Eye before. It will have a place of honor in the Museum.

I'd love to have one of Ushnar's old dogs for my museum. They're very interesting. His new dog though, it can be mean. He's trained it to attack cats and anyone that tries to take its food. I pity the poor Khajiit that tries to steal dog food from Ushnar.

Another Pelvis of Pelagius? I don't think that's possible, honestly. It must be a fake.

But... I already have... or had.... How odd. It seems to be missing. I'm sorry I don't have the funds to purchase it from you. Again.

That's amazing! The pelvis of Pelagius III! An honored madman if there ever was one!

I love this one. It's a Screaming Maw that can't scream! Isn't that just the Oddest thing you've ever seen?

Oh, yes, I've already shown you this shelf, haven't I? My poor old brain just isn't what it used to be!

The Ring of Disrobing -- removes your clothes if you put it on. Now, don't you go trying it! I have enough Oddities on display already, hahaha.

This case here I'm saving for something special. Wouldn't you like to be the one to find something Odd enough to go on display here?

Here's a new addtion to the Museum, one of my favorites. A dagger that heals whomever it cuts! Isn't that deliciously Odd?

Oh. That's strange, I thought there was something else here... well, no matter. Just losing my mind or something! Right this way.

A lovely little Oddity -- a key made from a Hound's Tooth. And no one even knows what it opens, imagine that! Shall we move on?

I think something's missing from this shelf. Or it could be just my old brain playing tricks on me again. Oh well, let's continue the tour, shall we?

This one is perhaps more unusual than truly Odd, but some people enjoy it. Truth be told, I only display it as a favor to the donor.

As you can see, I have plenty of space here for new Oddities, so think of me when you run across anything Odd!

Here's something truly Odd -- a Soul Tomato! A tomato that can act like a soul gem! No one has yet been able to explain it.

Were you in here last week? Wasn't there an exhibit in this case then? Oh well, I must just be going senile, hahaha!

This is a lovely little Oddity -- a two-headed Septim! Take your time, there's no rush.

Well, this case seems to be empty. Strange. I'm sure that yesterday... ah, my memory just isn't what it used to be. Let's see what else we can find.

Here we have the mortal remains of a fellow named Din, who as I understand was driven mad and killed himself, a truly Demented act.

Yes. I've been meaning to put something here, but it seems I haven't gotten around to it. Although I distinctly remember preparing an exhibit....

Over here is the Pelvis of Pelagius, the greatest Emperor that Tamriel has ever seen, as well as being completely mad.

Hmm... I could have sworn that I used to keep something very Odd on this shelf. Oh well. Let's move on.

This right here is one of my favorites. A lump of amber in the shape of your head, my Lord! A very popular item, too, if I may be so bold.

This right here is one of my favorites. A lump of amber in the shape of Lord Sheogorath's head! The wonders of nature never cease to amaze.

This case is waiting for something especially Odd. If you run across anything Odd, be sure to bring it by and it might end up on display here!

Here in this case is a disgustingly deformed Swamp Tentacle. Such a freak of nature has never been seen before, and hopefully not since either!

You know, I always walk over here thinking there's another exhibit, but there never is. Silly me!

Here you see the Blind Watcher's Eye. A most unusual specimen collected at great peril by... some intrepid adventurer!

Here is... well, I think there used to be something very Odd here, but it seems to be missing now. Let's move on.

Oh. Another Mute Screaming Maw. I already have one of those on exhibit.

I've been looking for one of those to replace the one I used to have on display. At least I think I did. I truly wish I could afford to buy it...

Oh, how cute! Look how it tries and tries to scream but no sound comes out! This is perfect for my museum!

I'm so sorry. I already have a Ring of Disrobing. There's really no place in a Museum of Oddities for duplicates, as I'm sure you can understand.

That's just like one that's gone missing from my Museum. If only I had the funds to replace it.

Oh, my. How wonderful! A ring that removes people's clothing! This will be one of my most popular exhibits, I'm sure.

That's so strange. I got one of those just the other day. Sorry. Maybe you can start your own collection of oddities, hmm?

Oh, yes, I have one of those... no, that's the one that I misplaced the other day. I'd really like to replace it, but funds are so tight...

Well isn't that just the Oddest thing! A dagger that heals people. Who would make such a thing, and why? I absolutely adore it!

Honestly, I'd never seen one before until recently, and now to have two turn up! That's Odd in itself, isn't it? But I really can't use it, sorry.

What luck! I seem to have misplaced the one I used to have on display. I really can't afford to buy it from you though.

What a perfect little Oddity! Just strange enough that it makes you go "Hmm?" but not so strange as to become a Miracle or an Omen. Thank you!

We already have one of those, I'm afraid. It wasn't all that Odd to begin with, honestly. We certainly can't have two.

Seems like I've seen one of those before. But I guess it is Odd enough for the Museum... but I certainly can't justify buying it from you.

Hmm. A bowl that you mix potions in. Doesn't seem all that Odd to me... well, I can see you're trying, so I'll find somewhere to put it.

You wouldn't think there would be two of those in the world, now would you? Sorry. Keep looking and I'm sure something truly Odd will turn up.

That looks just like one I used to have. Or maybe I saw it in a book... in any case, I wish I could afford to buy it from you, but....

Oh my, that is Odd! I've never even heard of such a thing before. We'll find a nice place for it here in the Museum.

That's too bad. I already have one of those. Can't very well have two in a Museum of Oddities, now can we?

I already have one of... wait a moment, no, that's the one I can't find now. If only I had the money to buy it off you....

Oh, a Ring of Desiccation! That's one of my... well, was one of my favorite Oddities. If I had the money, I'd buy it off you right now.

Interesting. I could have sworn I used to have an arm like that in my museum. I have just the place for it, if only I could afford to buy it....

.

Here's the Ring of... well now, where did it go? Things have a way of disappearing around here that's enough to drive a person insane!

Hmm. You haven't seen a huge severed arm with an axe for a hand anywhere, have you? I seem to have misplaced mine. Ah, well.

Pygmy Skull

There used to be a pygmy skull here, I was sure of it. My very first Oddity. I couldn't have imagined that, could I? ... Well, let's move on!

Oh, that looks just like a little skull I used to have. I would love to have one back, but the Museum just isn't drawing the crowds anymore...

Din's Ashes

(Upon giving her Din's Ashes): This is unsual! The ashes of a famous madman are perfect for my Museum!

(Speaking to her about Din's Ashes for the first time after stealing them back): Really? But I already have Din's Ashes. I'm afraid someone must have taken advantage of your gullibility.

(If offered again): Where did you find that? I was sure I once had Din's Ashes on display here... I wish I had the funds to replace them, they were very popular....

Two-Headed Septim

Two Tibers are always better than one, I always say! We'll take good care of him here in the Museum, don't you worry.